Unexpected Blessings

For  a long time, I went to bed thinking about a certain person; the same person. When I'd wake up that person would be the first person I'd think about. For years it was the same thing, day after day thinking about the most important person in my life. Now that that person isn't in my life anymore, it's a hard switch to just turn off. Here it is, almost 5 months since my relationship fell apart, and just recently I'm starting to have nights where she's not the last thought on my mind and mornings where she's not the first thought when I wake up. However, that doesn't mean that the healing process is over. But it is a great start. I wish I had the magic formula for healing though. Sometimes it's quick and easy, and other times it's slow and painful. I guess it's all part of the process.


I guess there is something to say for that rebound relationship. It takes your mind off the one you love and puts it on your "distraction." The problem is, I don't like the idea of a rebound relationship for the reason that I just described. A distraction. People should never be a distraction. After the way I felt after my break-up, there's no way I could do that to someone knowing that I was just using her as a bridge to a "land of true-love forgotten." That's just not me. But, the thing that sucks is that I will just continue to work myself through it, asking God for healing and comfort. Hurt, memories, confusion. We all go through them in rough times, and for me I think that they're necessary. There's a song on Christian radio right now called "Blessings" by Laura Story. If you get a chance, check it out. She goes on to describe things in the song that wouldn't normally be thought of as blessings. The chorus goes as follows:

"What if your blessings come through raindrops?

What if your healing comes through tears?

What if a thousand sleepless nights are what 

It takes to know you're near?

What if trials of this life

Are Your mercies in disguise?"

This song really resonates with me. Maybe this is how I'm supposed to get closer to God. When we hurt, He is waiting for us to ask Him for help. Help to take the pain away, help to block the thoughts of that person, help to relieve the stress of life. We plead with Him to just do anything for us so we could have just the smallest feeling of happiness. But, He doesn't want us to have a small feeling of happiness, He wants us to experience happiness on a level that we could never even imagine. The only way to do that is through  a relationship with Jesus. I wish I knew exactly how it works, but I just know that it does. When my focus is on Him, I am more content and happy than I ever have been. Even when my life seems like it's falling apart around me, I can still have joy and contentment. Other relationships seem to benefit, and I'm able to be grateful the blessings around me. I know that only the power of Jesus could make that happen for me. Yes, things can be hard, and I still get the feelings where it seems like the pain and stress will never go away. But, those are the things that Laura Story was talking about in the lyrics above. It's at those moments that God has my full attention and is able to draw me closer to Him. Sometimes hurt, tears, stress, and trials really are His mercies in disguise. Sometimes we have to go through these things in order to become who He has meant for us to be. Though bad things happen, it is in those times that God wants us to call on Him for His strength and His power to overcome the trials. That's how He gets us to heal. We don't always understand while were going through it, but we must be faithful. There's a saying out there that is pretty popular, and I believe it to be true. "If God brings you to it, then He will lead you through it." We just have to be willing to take His lead and not our own.

There is no doubt in my mind why I am content in my life, even though I'm falling on hard times. It's God! I am so grateful that He is merciful and loving, because I fall short of His expectations every single day. But, day after day He gives me another chance, no questions asked. He takes me in His arms, forgives me, tells me He loves me, and sends me on my way to share His love. Some days I do really well, but I'm not perfect by any means. I need forgiveness DAILY! And He always delivers. I thank the LORD for His forgiveness and for taking my hurt and sorrow and turning it into contentment. I would like to leave you all with a verse that I had recently read and thought that it would be perfect for the way I have been feeling. Sometimes I just need to slow down and remember that God has my back.


"Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." - Phillippians 4:6-7. My favorite part about this verse is the part that says, "and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guide your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus." All understanding!!! That's pretty powerful to me. I don't have to worry about knowing why I'm going through stuff because God will give me peace through Jesus. I just have to be willing to follow. Thank your for reading. God bless!


Until next time...
Trevor